Quadruped Surprises Nation, Announces Presidential Bid

It's been a historic year in presidential politics. It's a year in which an African American has won the nomination of his party, narrowly defeating the first woman to make a truly concerted run for the White House.

And now, it's about to get a whole lot more interesting.

Get ready for the first quadruped to occupy the Oval Office. I'm here today to announce my formal candidacy for President of the United States.

No doubt this news gives most of you -- as well as most of the country -- paws, (make that, pause) but this year has proven that all of the old stereotypes can be tossed out. I think it was either Will Rogers or Paris Hilton who said, "I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons." Well, fellow Americans, the times they are a'changing. Canines are people too, or at least most of us feel like we are. There's more to us than just cute, furry faces and feces.

A Jack Russell Terrier does not come to a decision like this without a lot of thought and kibble behind it. Recently in this blog, I called for one of the candidates to step forward and show the kind of leadership needed to lead the country through what can only be called an oil and energy crisis. After weeks of having this call for leadership circulating on the Internet, some of my worthy opponents have finally decided to take a position on what is without question the most important issue in this election.

Mr. McCain has called for 45 new nuclear power plants by 2030 and for the renewal of offshore drilling. I made it clear in my previous post that these are mere puppy steps on the way to where we ultimately need to be, but at least someone has let us know they're aware of the problem. And Mr. Obama's idea? Let me be very kind and say that I'm waiting for the punch line.

It's taken an economy in turmoil to motivate people to do what we recommended more than a year ago on this blog: stop paying twice for water! Americans are realizing that they are often paying twice for tap water when they buy bottled water, and they are starting to come to their senses.

It is with utmost humility that I point out to my fellow Americans and future constituents that you don't often see this type of futuristic thinking and leadership skill in a miniature breed. Instead of sitting on the sidelines, I decided -- after consultation with my assistant -- that it was time to offer my talents (which include fetching my squeaky toy and barking The Star Spangled Banner on key) to the country.

As we inch toward November, we'll outline our platform and make other very interesting announcements here first on this blog. So visit us often to follow this historic run (oops, forgot to heel) on the road to the biggest upset in political history.

As a bit more of an introduction, here's a short bio. And, in the age of Internet communication, I'm convening you, the American people, as my committee to vet veep candidates. Post your comments here at the blog on who you think should be my running mate.

See you on the campaign trail -- if not on the walking trail in my parents' neighborhood.